A Deadly Affair (2017) Reviews

• Everybody makes mistakes

  darkavenger772017-06-05

  Only one review here so far, so I thought I'd chime in. My title is a catchphrase used by three characters in the movie. If you're expecting quality drama, you too have made a mistake. If you want to see one of the funniest scenes in recent Lifetime movies, then no mistake. Mary, the Lifetime Heroine (LH) and Charlie are married and Charlie, the requisite guy in need of a shave, ends up getting ganked at a home he is remodeling. Body count: 1. This movie recycles no fewer than 6 of the actors from the Lifetime movie Nanny Seduction, and apparently used the same filming set. Reminds me of the low budget kung fu flicks where they filmed two at once on adjoining sets. As a character was kicked through a window, they'd say "There he goes!" while on the second set the line was "Here he comes!" The same actor plays a detective in both movies. It's somewhat unique in that it utilizes not one but two Lifetime Psychos (LP) and is not set in Washington but Mississippi. Kind of odd how no one has a southern accent though. Charlie has a sister Crystal that appears to be a little twisted and is increasingly unfriendly to the LH. The LH was hit on by her neighbor Trevor (LP1), but she shot him down (not with a gun) in the opening scenes. Trevor's wife Susan (LP2) is Mary's friend and a criminal defense attorney. I have to say it was pretty obvious she was the killer from early on. The LH makes use of LP2 once the police start questioning her about Charlie's murder. LP2 has the funniest scene in the movie. The LH is the school librarian, and as suspicion grows against her, the school plans on putting her on indefinite leave. She appears at the school board meeting, which is apparently held in a classroom as all of the "board" are sitting in one-piece school desks. As the LH begins to plead her case, LP2 busts in, calls her a bitch, and slaps her! She then airs some dirty laundry about the LH sleeping with LP1. That was truly a laugh out loud scene, and it gave the movie 5 Lifetime movie points, the most I've ever awarded for one scene. A huge plot hole is of course the LH being suspected since she was at home with her phone when Charlie was ganked. Cops use triangulation to put people at crime scenes or to exclude them. She would have been excluded early on. A similar plot hole takes place because Crystal was supposed to be at the beach house near the time of the murder, but she was with Mary during that time. Fast forward to the last 30 minutes. The LH drives to the beach house and LP1 is there. He cements his status as a LP here and the LH shoots him down again (still no gun, but keep reading). There are 25 minutes left, so you know he's not the killer. He can't control himself around the LH. Dude, she is not that hot, you could do a lot better. With lines like that, he's a great LP. LP1 finally attacks the LH and as he is choking her, LP2 hits him from behind with a convenient board, knocking him down, and then holding him at gunpoint. Appropriate background music here would have been Warren Zevon's Send Lawyers, Guns, and Money. The LH ends up leaving the room for some water and hears a gunshot. She returns and sees LP2 shot LP1, claiming he attacked her, even though we saw him on his knees asking her to forgive him. Third time was the charm, he was finally shot down with a gun. LP2 says maybe LP1 was the murderer. As the LH is trying to text Crystal, LP1 comes around and is shot a second time by LP2. He manages to tell the LH "It was her" and gives her Charlie's unique wedding ring before dying. Body count: 2. LP2 goes into the standard "talk don't shoot" dialog instead of just shooting the LH. When Crystal texts the LH, she uses this opportunity to knock over a convenient paint can and run away. We see a knife was in the paint can and fell out. LP2 slips off her heels and gives chase. Sadly, there was no epic chick fight once they were outside, and the LH didn't run into the woods and fall down so LP2 could choke her and she could escape after knocking out LP2 with a convenient tree limb. Instead, the LH tries to make a getaway in her car and is again threatened by LP2 at gunpoint. They come back inside and via more talking not shooting LP2 lays out her plan. Crystal arrives and distracts LP2, giving the LH a chance to knock the gun out of her hand. There was another missed opportunity for an epic chick fight here and instead the LH uses the convenient knife by the paint can to hold LP2 until the police arrive. At the end things are patched up between the LH and Crystal and the detective apologizes for doing his job. Real movie score: 3/10 (higher is better). Lifetime movie score: 8/10 (higher is stupider).

• Ho Hum

  geoffox-766-4184672017-10-01

  Another LMN silly movie with bad actors. I have figured it all out by now with these dreadful films. It's all about leading ladies, over the hill, with long stupid hair, trying to look young. So, with hair blowing in the wind and a cell phone in their hand the plot thickens. These films are all about cell phones. If you have nothing to do, pick up your cell phone and call somebody. This becomes boring and predictable. I recognized one of the leads with bangs from a film, looking exactly the same, where she plays a demented baby sitter. In this she once again looks strange most of the time and you wonder if she's alright in the head. Sorry, I laugh at most of these films. Why do I watch them, you ask? To learn what bad acting is all about. The end.

• ***1/2

  edwagreen2017-03-14

  Interesting but familiar plot with 2 couples whose spouses are cheating with the other. When one is found murdered, attention immediately shifts to his school librarian wife. She gets help from a female lawyer friend whose husband had once made advances to her. We have the suspicious sister-in-law, but a very understanding mother-in-law. Am sure that the plot is given away at the school board meeting when the teacher whose husband was killed is placed on forced administrative leave.